Who are you talking with? What are you talking about?

Research shows that almost half of our conversations are about ourselves.

We tell stories to try to define who we are, to ourselves, and to others. By telling stories we bond. By listening to other peoples stories we strenghten that bond. The bonding activates the brain’s reward system, just like sex or food. The reward system is activated more when the listener asks questions about the thoughts and feelings regarding the story, which is called active listening. (Active) listening to others is the emotional equivalent of giving them sex or food.

Personally, I love the process of 2 stories being integrated to 1!


–       Mike Lehr, The feminine influence in business

–       Frank Rose, The selfish meme, The Atlantic, October 2012 edition

Love is…

Love can be known by what it is not:

Love is no romance.

Love is no thought about love.

Love is no feeling:

an emotional high is no love.

Love is no attachment:

needing someone,

or needing something from someone is no love.

Love is no desire of the body.

Love is no separation.

Love is not human.

Love never begins and never ends:

falling in and out of love is no love.


Do you know what love is?